Ok.  I'm sitting at 204lbs.  I told myself I would not cross 200lbs and I did.  I'm not getting fat again.  Today is my first successful fast.  Chicken breast, some califlower with humus, apple, and a few coffees.  If I can hit the sack at 9pm, I'll set the tone for tomorrow.  Once I get back down to 180lbs as my body doesn't want to go below that, I'm going to start jogging.  I feel like it will be a good stress relief as I'm looking for alternatives to writing.  No one reads this stuff so I'm not going to keep adding content to this site if I don't have to.  The goal is by December 15th I'll be 180lbs.  I'm not going to weigh myself until that day.  I don't want to add tension to this fast by dwelling on fluctuations.  Wish me luck.

So I've accepted that my body wants to be at 188lbs.  I managed to get down to 181lbs (again) but my body just doesn't budge beyond that.  So I decided I'm going to start swimming.  I'm going to do this every weekday for an hour.  Time to tone.  I'll eat normally to secure a comfortable eating habit that allows for unbalanced snacking.  I'm very fortunate that I've have not regained the weight I've lost.  I wish I knew how I did it so I could share it with you.  Best advice I could give is to stabalize your weight through a strict diet for a couple months.  Slowly introduce "fun" calories.  I like all-dressed ricecakes.  Super satisfying.  I polish off a sleave in a sitting.  Try different dips with raw veggies.  Baba Ganoush is my new favourite.  Not sure it's just the brand I got, but it tastes like creamy bacon bits.  Yum.

Coffee, tea, water, single can of tuna (in oil).  170 here we come!  Also, I only weigh myself once a week.  I do check the looseness of my belt and my cheak bones in the mirror.  Somehow I gained 8lbs very slowly.  I enjoyed eating like shit for a few weeks, maybe a month.  I'm back on the horse.  Data, diligence and patience.

UPDATE:

It took me a 10lb gain before I could get back on the horse.  I'm full bore fasting and it's great.  Maybe only weigh yourself every 2 weeks.  Everyone fluctuates.  I'm extreme with my protocol, but so long as you're in a calorie deficit you'll lose fat.

Data, diligence & patience.

I think I'm a "Megan."  I take the principles of conservation from Veganism, but with the benefits of reality understanding calories.  I eat 100g of ground beef with an undressed mango salad, apple, and multivitamin.  I burn 1lb a day.  I like that I can tune my metabolism with calories.  Calories is energy required to balance.  What balances you is a disorder of temptation.  Calories, politics, Elvis...what's the difference?  A calorie is the disorder of temptation; who wants to kiss a participation trophy?  People who don't know how to see without victomhood sabotaging the hero within.  Be your own hero.  Lose weight to save the day.

So it looks like I'm free-falling again, which is exciting to think third time's a charm.  Fingers crossed I can breaze past 180.  

Forming a new protocol:

6:30 Coffee
8am Coffee & large camomiale tea
         Apple (not coffee) to squash cravings
3pm 100mg of groundbeef with a mango salad.
         Multivitamin
         Water, water water.
9pm Bed

Just trying to eat normally but I'm prepping for another fast.  For this week, I'm going to eat 200g of ground beef with mango salsa.  I want to be full of nutrition and cut the eating before bed.  I'm not giving up.  Unless my doctor tells me otherwise, I'm fasting to 170.  That's my next goal.  Then maintain the weight for a little while.

"​Imbalance is a constant dancing between extremes." John Ralph Tuccitto

180 was like hitting a brick wall.  180 is my 150.  I achieved all I can do.  That's scary to think my best performance lost me the race.  I can adapt by streaking into the LEAD of something I didn’t sign up for.  I'm not signed up to fail, but reality requires I die at some point.  If reality is ambitious, I'll die sooner than I'm ready to let go.  I didn't sign up to fail, and I didn't sign-up to win.  Spectators concede to athletes with their blue-collar time, energy, and money.  I'm no athlete, and sports doesn't impress me.  I'm an umpire.  I'm optimism riding mother nature.  Mother nature gives you what God wants: good grief.  

Eating is "GOOD GRIEF."  Eating is a celebration of one less day on earth.  If good grief is defined by fast lives...you love to celebrate predictable failures with vices.  Indulge in the death I so accept with good grief.  I eat because I didn’t sign-up to fail.  Stop feeling like a loser.  Get up.  Go for a walk, get away from food while you burn calories.  Be grateful when we overcome, and don’t anticipate WITH good grief when we fail again.  The inevitable is a wave that arrives on shore.  Follow God’s tide with good grief, indulge within forgiveness.

Well here I am, back to where I was a few years ago.  Looks like 180 is a hard plateau.  I tried hard to break the plateau by binging up to 187lbs then losing the weight to break through 180.  This is my second day without progress.  I was losing 2lbs a day up until now.  This isn't my first rodeo though.  I'll keep pushing through the 170's because I'm so close to my goal.  Stay tuned.

I felt myself struggling at 180lbs so I decided to have a well deserved cheat day.  I had rapini, apple pie, cookies, hamburger, brocolli, porkloin, salami, and some bread.  After all that I only gained 2lbs.  No I'm going to consume nothing but coffee, water, and tea for the next three days to flush out my system, then back to the routine.  Next stop, 176.

75% of your hunger has nothing to do with nourishment.  Hunger is a pig with a bottomless stomach.  Hunger wants constant submission.  Food is not entertainment.  Splurg once you hit a plateau.  Regroup with just coffee, tea and water until you break through the barrier.  Stabalize with your food.  I just want my face to be more defined.  I want my cheakbones to shine.  When I hit that target, I'll just increase the calories.  But fasting is a way of life.  It's my testimony.  That's what 'Road to 150' is, a fasting testimony.  Do your own research.  I'm not a doctor.  

So after my cheat day, I had nothing but coffee, tea and water for two and a half days losing 2lbs a day.  I would have easily done 5 days but my foot started to swell.  I couldn't stand on it at all.  I feared this was related to my fasting so I stopped the starvation and ate something.  My foot swelling and pain persisted for 3 days and nights.  I finally went to emergency.  Turns out because most of the walking I've done has either been in sandles or walking barefoot in my kitchen that impact is responsible for my foot.

I was prescribed an anti-inflamatory and pain meds.  My foot is 95% better and I've started walking again.  Getting past 184 is a big deal for me because it represented my latest plateau.  The next big goal is 176lbs.  A couple years ago during my last successful fast, the lightest I acheived was 177lbs.  I'm getting pretty skinny but I'm not happy with what I see.  I'm sticking to my routine because it works.  I am going to the doctor today to schedule a full body checkup to see if everything is ok.  Stay tuned.

So my strategy didn't work.  After a few days, I ended up weighing myself and I was still stuck in the 187's.  So I decided to eat like shit for a couple days.  Now I'm going to attempt a 24-48 hour fast.  I'm hoping my body will respond well.  I hope I can successfully complete a 48 fast.  Then I'll return to consuming 500 calories a day.  I've been in this situation before.  I just need a breakthrough weightloss and I'm back in the saddle.  I'm not giving up.  I've come too far to give up.  150 is still my goal.

When you break your fast accidently, you want to get back on that horse.  Switch to a week out.  Do not look at the scale until a week has passed; remember the last weight you were at.  Think of a number that would make you happy.  A number that would be a welcome suprise.  For me, it's one lb less than what I should have been.  So I was 185 on track to 184.  My suprise weight is 183 in a weeks time.  When I broke my fast I shot up to 187.  Weight is a one dimensional metric.  Just go by the feel of a belt/jeans around your waist.  If you HAVE to obsess...make it convenient.

Ok, here I'm going to write down my routine for future reference:

Wake up at 5:30am.
Fasted-Walk for a hour.
Have two coffees at 6:30am no more than 2 cream 2 sugar each.
One Tims small dd at 9:30am.
11am to 12pm eat 100g of ground beef, plus a few slices of mango.
​Multi-vitamin
One Tims small dd between 1-3pm.
Water, water, water, water, water.
Walk for an hour at 8pm.
9:00pm bedtime.

Do not deviate and you will lose up to 1lb a day.

HINT:  At the beginning, weigh yourself every morning when you wake up.  Tweak your routine until you start losing 1lb a day.  Then you only weigh yourself once a week.  This will go a long way in preventing the daily pressure of losing weight.  After a week, you'll lose weight and you won't be dwelling on the days you fluctuate in wieght.

Cheat days are inevitable.  Don't spiral.  No more than 2lbs gain.  Stop yourself any way you can.  Sometimes its good to reset your system, but other times it knocks you off your horse.  Don't panic, don't give up.  Stick to the routine for a week and weigh yourself at the end of the week.  If you make ANY progress, that's a huge win.  If you make no progress, that fuckin sucks.  Don't give up, exercise more.  Add an extra walk in your day.  Do new routine for a week and then weigh yourself.

​Add more walking until you break through.

Ok.  I was weighing as low as 207.6 before Friday.  I weighed myself on Friday and I was 210.  My body fluctuates and I've grown tired of the documentation.  From now on, I will only post here every 10lb weight loss is registered.  The next time I post here will be when I reach 200.  When that will be, who knows?  Ciao.